Before the Proof
Behind my Not Til Now speech, the nerves, and the momentum
Welcome back to Behind the Mic — raw reflections from a writing coach, author, and event producer who believes everyone has something worth sharing.
Oh, my goodness.
As I sit here writing my opening words for Not Til Now™, I’m being struck with all these emotions and AHA moments.
One of the very first things I wrote was this:
“I have never danced alone on a stage…NOT….TIL….NOW!!!!
And I’ve never hosted anything in an AUDITORIUM. NOT….TIL…..NOW!!”
When I typed that second one, I felt it in my chest. Because a few weeks ago, I found an old journal entry with a list of things that scared me. And written right there, in my own handwriting, was this:
“Filling the Lakewood Cultural Center.”
I wrote that long before this event existed or even had a name. Before I could picture what it might look like or who would come. And now, before I have proof that I can do this version of hosting for this kind of event in this big of a room…
I’m doing it before I’m ready.
As I keep writing, I’m noticing other times lately that I’ve been moving before the proof shows up.
Trademarking Not Til Now before the first show even happens because I believe in it that much.
Putting myself in the lineup instead of staying safely behind the scenes.
Saying yes to an impromptu radio interview.
Last month, I went on 850 KOA to talk about NTN with Mandy Connell!! Minus the time I told the story of being alone in NYC on Valentine’s Day to Slacker and Steve, THIS was my first radio interview.
You can listen here.
The coolest part of this whole thing?
How it happened.
Back in 2023, after the first Moms on the Mic, I slapped this post on Facebook:
This was about Not Til Now. And now that it’s come to fruition, I went back and replied to everyone who commented that they were interested.
One of those commenters happens to be the mom of Mandy Connell’s executive producer. (I was unaware of this!)
She sent it to her son. (Also unaware of this.)
He sent it to Mandy.
And suddenly, I was receiving a message that they wanted me on the show.
Here’s what’s cool:
Someone believed this belonged on the air before I ever thought to pitch it.
Which, if you listen to the interview, is exactly how Ed Prather ended up in the show. His wife threw his name in first!
I was so nervous that whole day leading up. I was even crying into the couch at one point. But once I got there…once I was around other humans…I was totally fine. More than fine, actually. It was exhilarating.
(There is a strong theme in my life of: alone with my thoughts = spiral. In a room with people = grounded.)
And now, I’m excited to share that I’m going back to that same studio this Thursday for a follow-up interview, a ticket giveaway (TWO BOX SEATS!), and to play their “Of The Day” game.
If you’d like to throw your name in the hat or just listen to me fail hard at trivia questions, tune into 850 AM / 94.1 FM at 2:30 p.m. MT Jan. 22. As of now, the plan is to have listeners write into their text line and with one sentence about a “first,” and then we’ll pick the funniest one.
So, for example:
“The first time I went skiing, I wiped out my ski instructor.”
“The first time I went to a shooting range, I blew out my shoulder on the first try and they thought I got shot.”
(These may or may not be my own.)Be thinking of a good one and join us for the fun!
So…
As of this moment, 247 people have said yes to being in the room next week. Seats are filling, and every time that number changes, I feel both humbled and lit up. It feels like trust. People choosing something before they can fully picture it, too.
Watching that number climb has been another reminder of what happens when someone moves first.
I wrote “filling the Lakewood Cultural Center” down once without knowing why. And now, it’s becoming real.
This makes me wonder how many things are sitting in notebooks, Notes apps, or the backs of people’s minds…just waiting for a little movement.
If there’s something in you that’s been asking for a next step, even a small one, consider this your nudge:
You’re allowed to move before the proof shows up.
Until the next one,
P.S. Only 70 tickets left!
Some people wait their whole lives to try the thing they’ve always dreamed about.
Not Til Now is a live storytelling and performance event where everyday people step onto the stage to do something they’ve never done before — share a story, try stand-up, or finally say yes to a long-held dream.
This night honors courage and all things “firsts.”
Not just for the performers — but for the audience, too.
✨ To remember it’s not too late to begin
✨ To feel bravery unfold in real time
✨ To leave thinking, “Maybe I could do that, too.”
NTN is inspired by everyone I’ve ever watched step onto a stage with something real — unpolished, imperfect, and without on-paper “credentials.” It’s dedicated to those who are no longer with us, fueled by the wild world we’re living in, and rooted in the belief that showing up still matters.
📅 January 28, 7 p.m.
📍 Lakewood Cultural Center
🎟️ Tickets $40
👉 See the AMAZING lineup and get your tickets. (And as a thank you for being a subscriber, use code NOW for $10 off.)
Best for ages 13+
I love this and cannot wait for the event! You inspire me.